Jul 4, 2023
Navigating the seas of chronic illness can feel like traversing through an unending storm. Each wave represents a new symptom, a new challenge, a new hardship. Yet, it’s within the storm that the seeds of personal growth are often sown, sprouting in the most unexpected of places. My name is Kristina, and two and a half years ago, my life took an abrupt detour, steering me into the tempest of chronic illness.
In the face of these adversities, I found myself enveloped in overwhelming fear, a crushing sense of defeat, and a daunting loneliness. I was stranded in uncharted territory without the familiar compass that was my life prior to my diagnoses. As an ambitious Master’s student in Computer Science at Georgia Tech, working as a software engineering intern at NASA, the abrupt halt to my career was devastating. A path that once seemed so clearly defined was now obscured by a thick, unyielding fog.
This part of my journey was steeped in overwhelming darkness. It was as though I had been cast adrift on a stormy sea with no land in sight. My only companions were a series of chronic illnesses that consumed the life I once knew. My body, once a reliable vessel, felt like a ticking time bomb, introducing me to a series of symptoms that left me feeling bewildered and disoriented.
Yet, amidst the shadowy tides, I stumbled upon an enlightening revelation – my true passion in life. This glimmering beacon of hope arrived during a 40-day hospital admission, during my last battle against severe malnutrition. It was in this moment that I unearthed my love for graphic design, a passion that soon blossomed into my own business, Aesthetic Alchemy.
I want to share my story with you to show that even in our hardest moments, we can find opportunities for personal growth. I aim to inspire others navigating their own stormy seas, offering them the courage to believe in their ability to weather the storm, and most importantly, grow through adversity.
To grasp the magnitude of my journey, it's important to first understand what it means to live with a chronic illness. A chronic illness is a health condition that persists for a long time, often for the entirety of a person's life. These illnesses are diverse and can include conditions like diabetes, heart disease, arthritis, and many others. In my case, I've been diagnosed with several chronic illnesses, each affecting my life in different ways.
Living with chronic illness isn't just about managing physical symptoms. It fundamentally changes your daily routine, lifestyle, and often your plans for the future. Imagine waking up every day with a battery that's only half-charged. You have to plan your day meticulously to ensure you can do everything you need to without running out of energy. And some days, even the simplest tasks can feel like running a marathon.
In my experience, the first symptom was a loss of appetite. I also experienced tachycardia, a rapid heart rate, and bouts of feeling shaky. Over time, these symptoms escalated, affecting my ability to stand without feeling dizzy, leading to weight loss and increased anxiety. These changes began to encroach on every aspect of my life, disrupting my studies and making daily tasks a challenge.
Chronic illnesses can create feelings of isolation and fear. It's not uncommon to struggle with understanding why this is happening or to grapple with the reality of what your life looks like now. These are heavy burdens to bear, but it's important to remember that you're not alone, and, as daunting as it may seem, it's possible to carve out a fulfilling and successful career while living with chronic illness.
In the next sections, I'll share my personal experience on how I've navigated through these challenges, eventually starting my own business and growing personally and professionally despite the adversity.
Two and a half years ago, my life took a sharp turn. At first, it was a loss of appetite, followed by rapid heart rate, shaky feelings, and a tendency to black out when standing up. As time went on, these symptoms worsened, making my day-to-day increasingly challenging. I began to lose weight as eating became a struggle, and even standing without feeling faint turned into an ordeal. Even so, I somehow managed to complete my Master's level computer science classes, despite the growing hindrance of my symptoms.
A visit to the doctor initially pinned my issues on anxiety. But five months down the line, I was diagnosed with Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome (POTS), among other chronic illnesses. This marked the beginning of a relentless cycle of testing, hospital visits, and a seemingly endless wait to pin down the exact nature of my illnesses.
Being diagnosed with chronic illnesses can feel like the world has crumbled beneath your feet. I felt overwhelmed, defeated, and alone. My once-thriving academic and professional life came to a standstill. I had to leave my studies and internship at NASA behind, which was heartbreaking. I was swept into a long, dark depressive episode, trying to make sense of the cards I'd been dealt.
During a particularly difficult hospital stay, a ray of hope emerged. I was admitted for severe malnutrition due to my inability to eat or tolerate my feeding tube formula. The moment I found a formula that I could finally tolerate felt like a victory. I no longer had to fight daily for my nutrition, which gave me space to focus on something new. And that something new turned out to be my true passion - graphic design. This shift reignited a spark within me, providing me a reason to face each day with renewed optimism.
In the sections that follow, I'll share how I managed to transform my circumstances, turning adversity into a stepping stone towards personal growth and a fulfilling career while living with chronic illness.
There's a certain clarity that comes when you're stripped of distractions. For me, that moment arrived during a hospital stay when I was grappling with severe malnutrition. The daily fight for nutrition had consumed my life until we finally found a feeding tube formula that worked for me. With that immense burden lifted, I found myself with the mental space to focus on something beyond my health.
In the quiet hours of that hospital stay, I started toying with the idea of venturing into graphic design. I had always harbored a love for the arts, and this seemed like a promising way to blend my creative inclination with the realities of my situation. I could work at my own pace, from the comfort of my home, while nurturing my creative passion. Starting my own graphic design business, Aesthetic Alchemy, began as a hopeful thought in the confines of a hospital room and quickly took root.
My chronic illnesses, which had seemingly robbed me of so much, ended up playing a crucial role in this decision. Dealing with the harsh reality of chronic illness can feel like you're trapped in a body that doesn't want to cooperate. But this adversity also made me realize that I still had control over my dreams and aspirations. My health might dictate my physical abilities, but it couldn't stifle my creativity or quell my desire to achieve.
As the saying goes, "everything happens for a reason." In retrospect, I can see how my chronic illnesses unwittingly guided me towards my true passion. They forced me to reassess my priorities, leading me down an unconventional path – a path that was filled with the excitement of starting my own business and launching a fulfilling career while chronically ill. Little did I know then, how empowering this decision would be.
Embracing the world of graphic design and starting my own business was a thrilling yet daunting prospect. I launched Aesthetic Alchemy with an abundance of hope and an undercurrent of uncertainty. It was a leap of faith, fueled by my creative passion and a newfound belief in my abilities despite living with chronic illness.
Setting up Aesthetic Alchemy required a careful balancing act. Each day, I had to navigate my fluctuating health and the demands of launching a new business. Challenges were inevitable. The fear of a health setback loomed large, and there were times when I questioned if I was making the right decision.
Yet, every time I doubted myself, I turned my attention to the joys that Aesthetic Alchemy brought me. It was not just about graphic design; it was about creating, connecting, and contributing in a way that I hadn't thought was possible during the height of my illness. Each project became an opportunity to learn, grow, and channel my creativity. And with each completed project, I felt a sense of accomplishment that I was building something truly my own while coping with chronic illness.
Coping mechanisms that had helped me manage my illness became invaluable in managing my business. Practices like listening to my body, prioritizing rest, and maintaining a positive mindset were now also serving me in my entrepreneurial journey. When obstacles appeared, I remembered the countless hurdles I had already surmounted. I had learned resilience in the face of adversity, a skill that proved indispensable as a business owner.
Starting Aesthetic Alchemy was a testament to the power of personal growth through adversity. It proved that chronic illness didn't define me or limit my potential to achieve. In fact, it added a layer of strength and resilience to my journey that fueled my business's success and furthered my personal growth. Aesthetic Alchemy was a beacon of triumph in my battle with chronic illness, illuminating the path to a fulfilling career and personal fulfilment.
Embarking on this journey with Aesthetic Alchemy while battling chronic illness has been a transformative experience for me. It hasn't just been about starting a business; it's been about personal growth, resilience, and finding beauty in adversity.
Living with chronic illness has profoundly shaped my approach to business and life. It taught me to focus on what I can control and let go of what I can't. This lesson has been invaluable in business, where unpredictability is a given. As a result, I've been able to manage challenges and setbacks with a calm and composed mind.
Professionally, it's allowed me to be more empathetic as a business owner. I understand that everyone has their own battles, visible or not, and this understanding has helped me build more meaningful relationships with clients and partners. I've also found that my unique journey has resonated with many people, allowing me to connect on a deeper level.
Personally, navigating a career while chronically ill has been a process of constant learning and growth. I've become more patient, resilient, and compassionate towards myself and others. I've also become more self-aware, understanding my physical and emotional limits and learning when to push and when to rest.
One of the most significant realizations I've had is that adversity can indeed foster growth. It’s been a challenging, winding path, but every obstacle, every setback, has been an opportunity to learn, adapt, and grow stronger. Despite, and in many ways, because of my chronic illness, I've been able to build a fulfilling and successful career.
The truth is, chronic illness has been a tough teacher, but a valuable one. It has shown me that even in the face of adversity, we can flourish. It has taught me to redefine success and progress, and above all, it has underscored the power of the human spirit to overcome and grow. This growth through adversity is the heart and soul of my journey with Aesthetic Alchemy, and I hope it can inspire others who are on their own unique journeys.
Embarking on my journey with chronic illness and starting a business has been filled with important lessons. A key understanding has been recognizing that chronic illness doesn't define me. It's a part of my life, yes, but it doesn't dictate my abilities, dreams, or potential.
Another crucial lesson is the importance of self-care. Living with chronic illness requires you to prioritize your wellbeing and listen to your body. Remember, it's not selfish to rest, recharge, and do what's necessary to maintain your health.
To those dealing with chronic illnesses and feeling overwhelmed, I want to share this: Your journey might be challenging, it might be different, but it's not lost. Chronic illness can change your life, but it doesn't have to limit it. Find what fuels your spirit, brings you joy, and gives you a sense of purpose.
In the face of adversity, remember, everything happens for a reason. While it might not be clear immediately, you might find that these challenges are shaping you in ways you wouldn't have imagined. Keep growing through adversity, because in this growth, you'll find your resilience, your strength, and your true self.
In conclusion, my journey with chronic illness has been a challenging one, yet through adversity, I've grown in ways I never anticipated. My path to starting Aesthetic Alchemy, while different, was far from lost. This personal growth has shown me that living with chronic illness and building a career is not only possible but can also lead to unexpected triumphs.
To all those navigating the path of chronic illness, remember, your journey is your own. You are not alone, and you are more resilient than you think. Embrace your unique journey, and don't forget to celebrate the growth that comes with each step.